We started to talk about the most random stuff
As time went by we had our bodies closer and closer
Everytime I think about this I get really upset with myself because I don't remeber every detail - which I should
Somehow we ended up kissing
After that you do the math
I was nervous
Part of me wanted to tell him to stop - the rational part I guess
But the other half, or maybe more than a half, wanted him to continue
When people ask me why the hell did I do that I don't know what to answer and because of that I'm often caled a whore when I, for some reason, tell this to people
We did it
After some moments I forgot everything and went with it
Right there I lost my mind
My body was controlling me
It was nothing like I was expecting for my first time to be but I guess that happens with many people
I think about it now and maybe I shouldn't have done it
But what is done is done
As for the part where I had a boyfriend and he had a girfriend
Well, I decided to tell my boyfriend and we broke up
Our relationship hadn't been good so that was just one more reason to end things
We got back together after a year but ended up breaking up again maybe because we were not meant to be lovers
We are very good friends now and we talk about everything with each other which is great
As for the guy's girfriend
They broke up as well after some time but I ended up finding out that she didn't know what happened that night
He didn't tell her because he was an asshole and afraid of losing her
I think I wasn't the first girl whose virginity was took by him
There were some rumours going on at the time
They broke up because, according to the girl, they didn't spend enough time together to keep a good relationship
I was really mad when I found he hadn't told her about it because I'm younger and I told it and faced the consequences
I think he was just a pussy back then
Now he has a girfriend and they seem to really like each other
I don't hate him or anything as some people think
We talk sometimes but never mention what happened that night
It's like the forbidden subject for us
I really don't care
But something that does make me sad is that when I'm a grown up and have kids I won't be capable of telling them a pretty story about my first time...
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